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Mission Accomplished!

Once again a great thanks to Kate and John, who successfully against all odds managed to slaughter over 200 of Mrs. Donnie's pigs.

Keep in mind this is a great success for two reasons.

1. The millions of Kansasinian Lives we saved from turning into Zombies
2. We earned the respect of Mr. Timmy and we'll finally be able to retrieve Bouras. 

Take a look at his picture our interns sent us. Have you ever seen a more uplifting sight? 

Translated for Normal People

Sorry, after a series of backlash and e-mails we forgot that the common person doesn't understand the complex meaning and numbers behind our charts. As requested we are going to provide you with simple bullet points to understanding the mad cow disease and our plans to eradicate Mr. Donnie's farm of all the cows.

• The cows are being fed blue grass which effects the mind
• The mind defragments the brain of the cows which creates a desease
• This disease when translated into either meat or milk effects the human brain making them slow and zombie-like 
• this is why Kansas is full of such slow people

Here's is our simple plan to kill all the cows: we give John and Kate a bunch of weapons and at night when Mrs. Donnie is sleeping we have them kill them in any way they can. We don't have time to think of a simpler plan... unfortunately.  

Completed Research

It's been over a week since we obtained the sample from Kate and John on the Mad cow, but we finally discovered some vital information in regard to the disease. Take a look at these charts above. 

Mad Cow.

I think due Congratulations should be given to our great interns John and Kate, who successfully managed to kill this defective cow. 

They sent us a few sample which we will analyze in our labs to find the best and most proper way to rid Mrs. Donnie of her evil Cow population. 


Don't worry little Bouras, its only a matter of time before we return to your rightful owner. 

Trouble on the Farm

We just got word in from Katie and Jonathan. Unfortunately there is some trouble on the farm. Mr. Timmy is refusing to allow us into the pig barn unless we do a favor for him.

His neighbor Mrs. Donnie, who is also the premiere cow farmer in the American Mid-Central West (North of the Mississippi River)  Has over 200 cows who are all suffering from a extremely rare and deadly form of Bovine Spongiform Encephalopathy, or known to the masses as Mad Cow diseases. He claims that before he will allow our interns into the pig Barn and retrieve Bouras, we need to sneak over to Mrs. Donnie's farm and figure out a way to get rid of all her cows.

I GUESS IF ITS FOR THE GOOD OF MANKIND, IT CAN'T HURT, RIGHT?

More to be updated later....

The Farm.

Our best interns just arrived at the farm and they sent us this wonderful picture. 

Apparently, Mr. Timmy is the largest producer of Bacon in all the American Mid-Central West north of the Mississipi. It's no wonder that Bouras found his way to this pig farm out of all pig farms in the world. 

The Kansas Arrival

It's been along journey yet again, but we finally arrived in Kansas. 

We sent two of our best interns out on the job.  Katie Maye and Jonathan Kira. 

We have the utmost faith in them that they will get the job done and retrieve the three eyed pig Bouras and return it back to its rightful owner. 

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Well isn't this wonderful.

A Vernon, Kansas Local by the name of Mr. Timmy has provided us with the whereabouts of the unknown three eyed psychic pig that has been missing for over a week.

Congratulations Mr. Timmy, we'll send you our best man asap.


And Yes, we will make sure to promote your great home-murdered bacon!